STAR Flow, Chirality and Vorticity PWG

[webmaster AT star.bnl.gov]

Dear star-fcv-l AT lists.bnl.gov members,

Prithwish Tribedy ( ptribedy AT bnl.gov ) has commented on a material originally 
 
submitted by Xiaoyu Liu ( liu.6566 AT osu.edu ) at
https://drupal.star.bnl.gov/STAR/presentations/Quark-Matter-2023/First-Order-Event-Plane-Correlated-Directed-and-Triangular-Flow-BES-

Comment:
The abstract is already in a very good shape. A few minor comments are as  
follows.

I think you should start the first sentence as:
"In heavy-ion collisions, the..."

line 7:
"anisotropic flow parameters" --> "measurements of anisotropic flow  
coefficients"

The lines 10-13 talks about the "crucial energy range" but doesn't really say 
 
why it is crucial. I suggest you revise as follows:


"...in fixed target mode." -->
"....in fixed target mode, providing an ideal lever-arm to explore vn."

line 13:
"The STAR BES-II upgrades" --> "For such energies, the STAR BES-II upgrades"

line 13:
"us to measure flow in" --> "us to measure v_n in"

Make a para here:
"Directed flow (v1) describes"

line 17, let's always avoid "may" in QM abstracts :)
"and may provide"
-->
"and provide"

line 19, it's not clear what is the slope,
"slope of $v_1$ near mid-rapidity"
"$v_1$ slope ($dv_{1}/dy$) near mid-rapidity"

line 21:
"Triangular flow (v_3)"
-->
"On the other hand, triangular flow ($v_3$)"


"In this talk,"
-->
"In this contribution,"


line 26-28, change the voice:
"The measurement...will be shown..."
-->
"We will show...."

"several physics models."
-->
"transport and hydrodynamic model calculations"



"Additionally, model comparisons to v3 will be presented to find the source  
of this signal and demonstrate the vital connection to the equation of  
state."
-->
"We will also present model comparisons that identify the source of nonzero  
$v_3(\Psi_1)$ and demonstrate its vital connection to the equation of state."

















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