STAR HardProbes PWG

[Nihar Sahoo <nihar AT rcf.rhic.bnl.gov>]

Hello Veronica,

Please find my comments below on your nice proceedings.

L10: "…partons in a collision. " -> (not clear what is " a collision.") 
"…partons in collider experiments." Or "…partons in a hadron-hadron or 
heavy-ion collision."
L10-11: "Due to the small time and length scales of these collisions, 
jets are useful as a probe to study these collisions." -> Not clear, 
Please rephrase. For example, what is "small time", "length scale"? and  
"these collisions"
L18: "Jets from proton-proton (𝑝+𝑝) collisions …" ->"Jets produced in 
proton-proton (𝑝+𝑝) collisions …"
L19: "…a baseline of comparison for jets in heavy-ion collisions…" -> 
"…a baseline in heavy-ion collisions…" ; "…, such as p+A." -> "…, such 
as p+A collisions."
L20: "…jet quenching is commonly used …" -> "…jet is commonly used…" 
(Here jet quenching is a phenomenon, and jet is a probe)
L21: "…in central collisions …" -> "…in central heavy-ion collisions…"
L22: "are interpreted…" -> "is interpreted…"; "with a QGP" -> with QGP; 
"and are…" -> "and is…"
L25:"…too small for the formation of a QGP" -> "Small" of what? Not 
clear why QGP is not expected to form in p+A. Please rephrase in terms 
of initial energy density, etc.
L26: "…𝑝T < 2 GeV/𝑐" -> "…transever momentum pT < 2 GeV/c"
L27:"Because centrality is not as easily defined…" -> "As the centrality 
is not well-defined…"
L28-30: Can you please rephrase this sentence.

L33: "… taken during RHIC Run 15." -> "… taken in 2015."
L35:"The BEMC is composed of towers with 0.2 ≤ 𝐸T ≤ 30.0 GeV" -> Not 
clear. we use BEMC towers with this et range, but there are towers 
greater than 30 GeV, Is not that? Please rephrase.
L36." …charged tracks…" -> "…the charged tracks…"
L44: "This study uses R=0.4…" -> "This study uses the jet resolution 
parameter R=0.4…"
L45: Need to introduce "eta_lead" and "p_{T, lead}^{reco}"

Fig.1 Caption: "Charged underlying event multiplicity…" ->" The 
underlying event charged multiplicity…in the hight-EA…";
"..on pT,lead^reco" -> "on the pT,lead^{reco}"

L47: Need to mention "phi_lead" , "phi_trig"
L48: "…in a ∼ 64◦ region …" - >" in azimuth ∼ 64◦ region …"

L50: "The charged UE particle multiplicity …" -> "The UE charged 
particle multiplicity …"
L51: Fig. 1 -> remove gap (same for other places)
L52: UE -> the UE
L55: need to introduce EA_BBC (and also EA_TPC below)
L61: "the jet substructure observable mass …" -> "	the jet mass 
observable
L65: "This study in p+Au collisions at 𝑠NN = 200 GeV…"
L68: "…	and the hard scattering of the jet early in the collision. " -> 
Not clear, please rephrase/

Cheers
Nihar




On 2022-11-19 04:07, Veronica Verkest via Star-hp-l wrote:
> Hi all,
>
> I have made some changes to my ICHEP proceedings and uploaded them to
> Drupal (https://drupal.star.bnl.gov/STAR/node/61702). Since the
> deadline is Monday, I would appreciate any comments/feedback.
>
> Thanks,
> Veronica
>
> On Thu, Nov 17, 2022 at 5:06 PM webmaster--- via Star-hp-l
> <star-hp-l AT lists.bnl.gov> wrote:
>
> > Dear Star-hp-l AT lists.bnl.gov members,
> >
> > Veronica Verkest (vverkest AT gmail.com) has submitted a material for a
> > review,
> > please have a look:
> > https://drupal.star.bnl.gov/STAR/node/61702
> >
> > Deadline: 2022-11-21
> > ---
> > If you have any problems with the review process, please contact
> > webmaster AT www.star.bnl.gov
> > _______________________________________________
> > Star-hp-l mailing list
> > Star-hp-l AT lists.bnl.gov
> > https://lists.bnl.gov/mailman/listinfo/star-hp-l
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