STAR Flow, Chirality and Vorticity PWG

[Richard Seto <seto AT ucr.edu>]

Dear Junyi

Very nice poster. Most of my comments are grammatical. Also I would rearrange 
some things to highlight the important parts of the poster. 


Abstract
---------------
- don't you want to put finite **density** and pressure? Isn't it the high 
baryon density the interesting thing? That is what you say in the motivation 
section.

- where hyper-nuclei --> where  the hyper-nuclei
=================
Motivation
----------------
- Hyper-Nuclei is abundantly --> Hyper-Nuclei are abundantly

- 2nd bullet. Here is a suggestion
"The study of Hyper-Nuclei provides the opportunity to study the 
hyperon-nucleon (Y-N) interaction at high baryon density and temperature."

========================
STAR Detector
----------------
(I would say "The STAR Detector")
Larger acceptance -> Large acceptance

- Why do you say modest rates? At the fixed target energy, the detector does 
not limit the rates. The rate is limited by the amount of beam available and 
things like pile up. I would leave that out.
- Maybe use the space to indicate which detectors are most important to your 
analysis. (EPD, TPC...)

-"curve and the experimental results, here we do the nsigma" --> "curve and 
experimental results, we do a nsigma" ...

- 2nd bullet -->" The data is projected onto the x-axis and y-axis 
separately, and then fit using a multiple Gaussian function."

 - 3rd bullet --> "The extracted mean(mu) and width(sigma) of these Gaussians 
are used to select intervals for the identification of protons, deuterons He3 
and He4."

==============================
Lambda, He3Lambda and He4Lambda acceptace
----------------------------
- "are acceptance used" --> "are the regions of acceptance used"

- "are estimated with embedding data" --> "are estimating using the embedding 
technique"

======================
Collective Flow
------------------
- First bullet "Particle azimuthal distributions measured with respect to the 
reaction plane are expanded in a Fourier series:"

Actually I would likk most of this panel and label the Collective Flow and 
Event Plane Reconstruction sections as "Measuring the Collective Flow"

========================
Event Plane Reconstruction
 your resolution plot (an important one) is hard to read.
 Maybe get rid of some of the formulas. For the recentering and shift 
calculation formulas you can just refer to a paper and save some space.
 If people cannot see your plot, you may as well just not show it.
 

You might want to think about removing the "Collective Flow " Panel then for 
the event plane reconstruction just show the regions used (EPD ABCD etc) and 
then
the three sub event formula (to show which regions are used) and then show 
the resultion plot. Then you can have a bullet saying the recentering and 
shift corrections were done. You can show the flow vector formulas (the Q's) 
if you have space. You should indicate what you used for the weights.

You then have more space to show the signals for the for Hypernuclei
i would enlarge the results as that is one of the highlights. Enlarge the  
Legends - They are too small to read.

This will give you space to Enlarge the "Results" and " Energy Dependece of 
the v1 slope"  panels.


Now I give more specifics on the wording
===========================================
Lambda, H3Lambda... reconstruction
--------------

"KF Particle finder are used " --> "KF Particle finder is used"

3rd bullet "for signal" --> "for the signal"

4th bullet  - use the greek for the 3sigma. put an "a" in front of the "3" 
and another "a" before "bin"


==========================
Results (important plots)
-----

Make the legends BIGGER. To save some space you can get rid of "Collisions at 
RHIC"


What do you do for the systematic errors? If there are no systematic errors 
yet, you need to say so. If they are smaller than the markers, make a comment 
that
systematic errors are much smaller than the statistical errors.


Hyper-nuclei is mis-spelled.

===============
Energy Dependence (imporant plot)  -
--------------------------------
1st bullet - "increasing" --> "increases"

2nd bullet "fieid" is mis-spelled.

============================
Summary
1st bullet
"are" -->"is"
"with" --> "using the"

2nd bullet - rewrite as

"The energy dependence of the v1 slope of Lambda, He3Lamda, and He4Lambda was 
measured. The deviations of the v1 slope between the Lamda and hyper-nuclei 
increase with increasing energy.” 


If you have questions, please feel free to ask
Best Regards
-Rich