STAR Flow, Chirality and Vorticity PWG

[Prithwish Tribedy <ptribedy AT rcf.rhic.bnl.gov>]

Dear Ding,
  Your slides look very good. Below are a few comments from my side. 
With these included, I sign off.

Slide#3:
"From the first" --> "From the STAR measurements using the first"
"in STAR (BES-I)" -> "(BES-I)"
"How are" --> "How about"
"to early stage" --> "to the early stages"
"From BES-I it also shows hint of"
->"STAR BES-1 measurements also show hints of"

Slide#4: I think this cartoon is not the best one to point to Endcap 
TOF. You might find some figures of the STAR experimental setup here:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/gptrjsndbepcjq4/rhic_highlights2_mit_townhall_2022.pptx?dl=0

"at 7.2 GeV" --> "in √s_{NN}=7.2 GeV"

Slide#6: "through by from TPC dE/dx" --> "using dE/dx from TPC"

Slide#7: "Plot" --> "We compare measurements of"
"lever arm to improve liner fit" --> "wider lever arm in pseudorapidity 
& improve the linear fit"

Slide#10: "shows sign of turning negative to positive" -> "shows 
indication of sign change from negative to positive, with improved 
precision compared to the BES-I data"

There maybe a better way of saying what you meant by "connect well". I 
don't have a good suggestion. You can add "in rapidity" after "connect 
well".

"combine" --> "combined data from" or "combining measurements from"

Add "around √s_{NN}=10 GeV" before "will help" in the last bullet. You 
can also add "using more BES-II FXT data" at the end of this sentence to 
make your point more clear.


Slide#11:
"data" --> "datasets" sounds better
Remove "as well as COL data" and add "& COL" after "FXT"
"will have PID" --> "with PID"


Best,
Prithwish








On 2022-10-13 19:49, webmaster--- via Star-fcv-l wrote:
> Dear star-fcv-l AT lists.bnl.gov members,
>
> Ding Chen (dchen087 AT ucr.edu) has submitted a material for a review, 
> please
> have a look:
> https://drupal.star.bnl.gov/STAR/node/61324
>
> Deadline: 2022-10-27
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