STAR Correlations and Fluctuations PWG

["Keane, Declan" <keane AT kent.edu>]

Hi Zach,

 

STAR Management has asked me to take a look at a few posters, including yours.  This is an impressive poster and your eventual result will be very important and exciting. A few minor suggestions:

 

Box 1.:

It would be preferable if your 3^rd bullet had a similar verbal style as the others.  What about something like “Cumulants of net-proton number distributions vs. beam energy are a promising observable”

 

Box 2.:

RHIC collides Au+Au down to 7.7 GeV --> RHIC luminosity in collider mode is unusable below 7.7 GeV

 

Box 3.:

1^st bullet:  --> …shown by red box

3^rd bullet:  Top energy analyses --> Fixed-target analyses above 4.5(?) GeV

Last bullet:  validate --> increase confidence in

 

I can understand why you make the middle panel at the bottom bigger, but consider a partial increase in size of the two outer panels. 

 

Box 4.:

Why is “Truth” written in the legend box of the panel on the left?

 

Box 5.:

Conclusions --> Outlook  [since your results are still pending]

3^rd bullet:  validation --> cross-check

 

References:

Page number is missing from all references.

Issue no. is not needed and is usually not given.

Usual convention is to list volume number in bold (and not write “vol.”)

 

   Best regards,

   Declan

 

 

From: Star-cf-l <star-cf-l-bounces AT lists.bnl.gov> on behalf of Zachary Sweger via Star-cf-l <star-cf-l AT lists.bnl.gov>
Reply-To: STAR Correlations and Fluctuations PWG <star-cf-l AT lists.bnl.gov>
Date: Saturday, August 26, 2023 at 2:40 AM
To: STAR Correlations and Fluctuations PWG <star-cf-l AT lists.bnl.gov>, Hanna Paulina Zbroszczyk <hanna.zbroszczyk AT pw.edu.pl>, Toshihiro Nonaka <nonaka.toshihiro.ge AT u.tsukuba.ac.jp>
Cc: Zachary Sweger <zwsweger AT ucdavis.edu>
Subject: EXT: Re: [Star-cf-l] STAR presentation by Zachary Sweger for Quark Matter 2023 submitted for review

 

Dear Hanna and Toshihiro,

 

Thank you both for your comments. I've incorporated them into the poster and the new version can be found here: https://drupal.star.bnl.gov/STAR/system/files/Zach_Poster_QM_v1.pdf

 

One note: Hanna's second comment was about adjusting the wording on the same line that Toshihiro commented on, so I used Hanna's phrasing. I hope this is okay.

 

Thank you!

Zach

 

On Thu, Aug 24, 2023 at 4:59 AM Hanna Paulina Zbroszczyk via Star-cf-l <star-cf-l AT lists.bnl.gov> wrote:

Dear Zach,

 

Please find my minor comments on your nice poster.

 

Add somewhere a logo of DoE and add the statement  „Partially funded by..”

 

Part 2:

(RHIC) can only collide -> collides

 

With those implemented, I sign off.

 

Enjoy the conference!

 

Thanks,

Hanna

 

 

Hanna Paulina Zbroszczyk

PhD DSc Eng, Professor WUT

 

E-mail: hanna.zbroszczyk AT pw.edu.pl

Tel: +48 22 234 5851 (office)

Address:

Warsaw University of Technology

Faculty of Physics

Nuclear Physics Division

Koszykowa 75

Office: 117b (via 115)

00-662 Warsaw, Poland

 

Wiadomość napisana przez 野中俊宏 via Star-cf-l <star-cf-l AT lists.bnl.gov> w dniu 24.08.2023, o godz. 10:21:

 

Dear Zach,

 

I have some comments on your nice poster presentation.

 

With these implemented, I sign off.

 

Best regards,

Toshihiro

 

1. Introduction

(Critical Fluctuations)

- 1st bullet: Fluctuations of conserved charges

- 4th bullet: Cite Misha’s paper here?

 

(Cumulants and Moments)

- Cite [1] here?

 

(Previous Results)

- 2nd bullet: Add [2] at the end of the sentence

- 3rd and 4th bullets: Insert space after “=”.

 

2. The STAR Fixed-Target Program

- 1st bullet: … cannot operate at Au+Au collisions below 7.7 GeV.

- 3rd bullet: New data from \sqrt{s_NN} = 3.0 - 7.7 GeV

 

(Challenges)

- 2nd bullet: higher energies, instead of highest energy?

- 3rd bullet: ID -> identification

 

3. Acceptance

(Top figures) Inside each panel, \sqrt{s_{NN}} = X GeV

(Right bullets)

- 1st bullet: Standard analysis window (write down rapidity and pT acceptance here) shown in…

- 2nd bullet: Insert space after “=”

(Overlap at 7.7 GeV): Insert space after “=”

- 1st bullet: Insert space after “=”

- Middle panel: \sqrt{s_{NN}} = 7.7 GeV

 

References

[2] (20 2022) -> (2022)

Remove “In” and “p.”

 

 

 

 

---

差出人: Star-cf-l <star-cf-l-bounces AT lists.bnl.gov> が webmaster--- via Star-cf-l <star-cf-l AT lists.bnl.gov> の代理で送信
送信日時: 2023年8月21日 12:48
宛先: star-cf-l AT lists.bnl.gov <star-cf-l AT lists.bnl.gov>
CC: webmaster AT star.bnl.gov <webmaster AT star.bnl.gov>
件名: [Star-cf-l] STAR presentation by Zachary Sweger for Quark Matter 2023 submitted for review

 

Dear star-cf-l AT lists.bnl.gov members,

Zachary Sweger (zwsweger AT ucdavis.edu) has submitted a material for a review,  
please have a look:
https://drupal.star.bnl.gov/STAR/node/64782

Deadline: 2023-09-03
---
If you have any problems with the review process, please contact  
webmaster AT www.star.bnl.gov
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